Alwan Khamis is a life coach who specializes in managing people’s affairs through self-awareness and their lifestyle health conditions. We caught up with him for a session on life coaching. This is how it went.
What is life coaching, in your opinion?
Life coaching is a structured, goal-oriented process that helps individuals gain clarity, overcome obstacles and unlock their full potential. It guides people to recognize limiting beliefs, improve their mindset and develop actionable strategies for personal and professional growth.
You have talked about a structured process. What process does life coaching entail?
With regards to life coaching, I can say, I am only ready when someone is ready, since the process is vulnerable and personal. I, then, take him/her through four critical stages as part of life coaching.
The first stage is Introduction. This is where I get the background information of the prospect, getting information on their life up to the time of contact. This is done by the prospect filling in a special form. The second stage involves Cross-examination, done a week after the day of first contact. This is meant to examine the authenticity of the background information shared a week earlier. In case the information does not match, we terminate the session since it means the person is not ready.
The third stage involves identifying the challenges and providing the solutions. This is usually the pinnacle of the whole interaction. The client is required to apply the solutions discussed and return after a month, for evaluation and feedback.
How does someone overcome the fear to be vulnerable (open up) to another person on their life experiences?
The fear is valid, however, you cannot get support if you are unwilling to open up. Not everyone is out to harm you so you need to be trusting enough to open up to some people.
With vulnerability comes the ease of manipulation/exploitation. How can someone know who to approach as a life coach, at a time when they are vulnerable and facing many life challenges?
Yes, this happens a lot. However, we need to trust our gut feeling especially at that stage of vulnerability. If you feel insecure around a person, then leave at the first instinct.
Also, a genuine life coach will not force you to join their session. It is supposed to be voluntary and you should only join when ready. Also check on the reviews for the life-coach online/offline to know exactly who you are dealing with.
Most of our young relationships and marriages are breaking up quite rapidly, with much violence being witnessed. Where are we going wrong, as youth, in your opinion?
The root cause is mostly a lack of self-awareness for many in our relationships today. Many young people, today, go into marriage blindly without fully understanding themselves. Most are not ready for the responsibility that comes with relationships and marriages. Adding to that, the allure of a perfect marriage as portrayed on social media entices many to expect a perfect partner. So when their imperfections come to light, it brings conflicts in relationships and marriages.
What is your parting shot?
Life coaching is for anyone feeling stuck or experiencing sadness, hopelessness, suicidal thoughts or social withdrawal. Reach out to a life coach if you are ready to shift your mindset and make a change in your life.
